Chris and I planned to have Nicholas. We wanted to be married for a full year atleast before we brought a child in this world!
We talked extensively about our finances and we put a budget together. We were in agreement that I would have to work. This was okay with me. I loved my job. I loved seeing the people every week. I was proud to walk through those doors and sit behind the front desk. I was somebody there. I remember the day Nicholas was born (obviously).
I had an emergency c-section and was too shaky to hold him. By the time I got to hold him it had already been an hour since he arrived. When we got home all I wanted to do was spend time with my little boy! Everyday we would wake up and sit on the couch! Everyday I would tell myself "okay, we are going to make it down stairs today!" We never did. I didn't want any distractions. I wanted that bonding time. I knew I was going to go back to work so I wanted as much time with Nicholas as possible! I went back to work after 5 weeks. I was able to work limited hours which in the long run gave me more time with Nicholas than just the 6 weeks I was going to take! Once our office opened back up for regular hours 9-6 it just became to much for me. The woman who takes care of Nicholas while Chris and I are at work gets to spend 4 hours with Nicholas. Chris gets Nicholas in the afternoons and gets the other 4 hours. I get home a little after 6, feed Nicholas, give him a bath, and rock him to sleep. His bedtime is at 8 sometimes 8:30 and for me......that is just not enough time. Yes, I am able to take Nicholas to work with me on Tuesday mornings and Thursdays but that is not quality time. I am answering phones, there are other offices trying to have meetings, it's not the same-yet I can't afford to not go on those days.
Everytime someone would have a baby and they decided to stay home I would act happy about it and try not to let the tears just roll. (surely I am not the only mom who feels this way) Chris feels bad b/c I can't be a stay at home mom. So when I received an offer that allows me 2 extra hours each night and a full day off.........Chris and I thought very carefully and pushed around pros and cons and at the end of the day we decided this was the best move for our family. I am very sad about leaving my current job but am excited to start a new chapter in my life. For those of you who know me from the clinic, I am going to miss seeing you and I have been very blessed to have met you-keep in touch!
